Change gonna come.

Sobriety is a strange thing. I don't mean in the traditional reference of drugs and alcohol, though that certainly applies, but I feel as my life so incredibly sober right now. Many exist in this state, a sort of consciousness that serves all of the senses well and acurate. But for me sobriety means that my personality reaches near somberbess. I love to entertain friends and family, it is what Iam most comfortable with, but right now I really feel like taking the back seat and chilling out a little and observing. Sometimes I feel like a show pony.. like I can't shake the expectation of myself to entertain and it bothers me. I miss my outrageous self.

My brother said last night that my current state is cautious and that it is really hard for people to process. He just explained that it is so different from my typical self that friends and family are having a hard time to understand where I am coming from.... translation: you are boring and no fun.

Give me a bit of time here. I am getting used to all of this and I can't feel alright about everything right now. when I come around we'll have great laughs, but I need a few feet of slack right now friends. Thank you.


Also, to my dearest Andrew. send good, supportive, loving vibes towards him. He needs it right now. and a very HAPPY BIRTHDAY to you Andrew. We love you!!


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