It has been determined.

By experts and doctors alike.. that I am a fat ass. This entry will be the only reference to this. so enjoy.


I went to Grinnell on Thursday to see a brilliant doctor who was the final step before it was official. I will be having Gastric Bypass surgery. The earliest will be end of September, the latest will be mid-October. This decision comes from years of contemplation.. it is not an easy choice to make. Truth about me is that as funny as I think I am and as much as I enjoy making others feel at ease with sarcasm and self depreciating humor- I am not a healthy girl. My health has been deteriorating significantly in the last two years. My doctor and several surgeons see this as the most realistic option, and I agree. My family history is tagged with obesiety ( I love that word by the way) as well as heart failure, diabetes, high blood pressure, etc. It is waiting for me. My father died at 38 of a heart attack after having a pace maker put in when he was in his early thirties- not something I want to sign up for. I am looking for a better quality of life- an I am actively searching for it- I am going after it. All I ask is for your support. If you choose to judge me, right on- but I don't need it in my life, so keep it to yourself. Yes , I have thought about the risk and tried many other options. I have genetics working against me.


What will happen to Claire? I will be in the hospital for three+ days. The Surgeon will make an incision from my rib cage to my belly button. They will create a small stomach pouch (that hold about 3/4 cup) and they will re-attach this pouch to my lower intestine. For me, they will attach my new pouch at a lower spot because of the amount of weight I have to loose. My entire lifestyle will change. I will not be drinking pop, smoking (already nixed), eating sweets, all that stuff. I will eat six small meals a day- and by small I mean no more than 3/4 of a cup. Once I have recovered I will exercise and do all of that stuff that people do to loose weight. This is not an easy process... it is not the easy way out. It is going to be a significant life change and I am counting on you to be there for support. (I will be able to drink alcohol again... it may just be awhile.. and I will be a super cheap date...yeah)

How quickly will Claire loose the weight? That depends on how i choose to approach this. It is expected that I will loose 30lbs in the first month. I have a lot of weight to loose and with the way they are setting it up- It should come off quite quickly... if I do my part.

Will Claire change her personality? Well, I suppose it is inevitible that my personality will change... I have spent most of my years putting every person before myself and and that is very easy for people to like... I am putting myself first here. With this I will have a greater sense of self and a better quality of life. I will still be the funniest person you know, not to worry. I will still perform whitney Houston at the Garden with Sam. I will still do the dance with Bongsley at ryan's.... and I will still have dedication to making this world a better place for people with disabilities. But I will look damn good in pair of deisel jeans while I am doing it- yeah- I'll shake it at cha!

Let me know if you have any questions- Ask me anything-I am past the point of being embarassed by this.

Much. love.
c

It really hurts when you leave....

Andrew left Sunday... so last Wednesday night I decided to give him a little something to remember us by. I started smacking him in the same spot on his arm... at first just to hear the high pitched "whoop" jump from his lips, but afterwards, I realized that I could give the gift that keeps on giving- at least for the better part of ten days. Lucky for me, Matthew, Damo, Ryan, Joh, Brad, and Jo thought it was as funny as I did... and above is the result. You may see a cruel, hurtful mark of foolishness... I see: HILARIOUS!

this is what you get for leaving. 

mmmmm.. sho is thirsty boy 

awww...boys! 

Cody, Ryan, Brady 

Iowa City a.k.a. the city of no consequence.

Why do I do the things I do when I am in Iowa City.... I lived there for the better part of four years and still shen i go back you would think that I am a twenty year old who has never had a drink in her life or a frat boy who is on his own personal sring break trying to tag everyone in sight. I would have to say that I am a adelightful combination of both. I like Iowa City because, cuturally, it is the best place in Iowa. Sure, it has its douche effect with all the the burb bitches and the tool boxes with their parents money but if you skim off that layer there is a community of well-informed people who will do anything for a great time.

Last thursday I went to Iowa Cit yot visit Cody. The plan was hang out, take it easy and lay low- to genuinely redefine the c&c effect as it had slipped a bi in the past months. Instead, I arrive and declare that i was lying- for the sake of everything true to our friendship we should probably start drinking. We started at the Billiards something because it was the only place we knew that has Silver Strike bowling... (please see previous reference to video bowling addiction) After what seemed like only a game or two (about 6) we had had 5-6 beers each and were ready to move on to the next place. As we were stepping out a friend called so we headed over to Kylas where brady and Ryan and Kyla were hanging out. kyla lives with 56 girls and then one creepy lesbo neighbor chick. If whe were actually gay- she would be alot cooler. (that peobably sounds ignoant...so be it) Anyway- we pick up some beer and I get id which is still funny to me and we walk to Klya's... I listen to Ryan and Cody tease each other in the way they do and then we head down to Joe's Place where we meet up with Cody's rromate Daryl and his friends. His friends were a bit boring but the Cody's friend christopher arrived and I really like him. He had interesting things to say and was bigger than himself- you could tell that there was so much more to himthan what he was talking about. I like that ina person. and Cody- your soon to be roomate Bart- totally gay. no way he is only "curious" Let a sista tell you- totally gay.

So we drink too much and get pitas and order a pizza and wear this total "uncle Jesse wig" and I look like a creepy gym teacher and Cody looks like a post 80's hair band member.

The weekend brought a mix of emotions with the annual "Man's camping trip" to which I was invited and then Andrew leaving on Sunday- I always think that I am prepared for these sort of goodbyes- and I don't know what made it SO difficult this year- but walking away from Andrew at the train station felt like someone reached into my heart and bitch slapped it. I cried alot. For the end of something great I cried. THere willbe days that will as bright as this summer, but knowing that something that great has gone is tough.

Allright- see attached pictures for an idea of the happenings of the last week.

oout.c