Thanksgiving Eve, America's drinking Holiday

My regards to the Valley High School graduates for their prime hosting abilities of after hours...

Actually, the true props go to Mr. Spencer Griffin, who managed to get me to go out old school style and drink my way accross Des Moines. (ou are a great chef and a great host Spencer) a big thank you to the asshole bartenders at Racoon River who were so discreet about telling us the bar was closing.

A big shout out to my new friends Phil and Heidi, I hope the drive was alright Thursday morning, thanks for the great night. Call me sometime, i would love to hang out again.. you both rock the boot, and the gay bar, what more can a gal ask for in a friend?


I have a REALLY funny story of afterhours.. will tell later, I need to make sure that the people present have no acess to this blog... its that good.


Thaknsgiving was great, I love the Griffin family, always. My family was AWESOME to hang out with- we had a fantastic day.

Congratulations to the griffins for the latest addition to the family!



lata!

claire

Distant fondness or convenient closeness?

The debate at hand is whether it is easier to be the great long distance friend or to be the convenient nearby friend. It comes from a history of friendship that usually heightens when my friends and I live apart and get to make the most of a few days each year when we are together. I enjoy close friendships, but I am better at friendships where I know there is a timeline. I know that this sounds ridiculous but it seems to be my forte. It is not that i take advantage of convenience, I just get swept into life fairly easily. It is also not to say that I do not make the most of time spent with close friends... it is just that i do not purposefully approach out time together in the same way.



I asked for your input and i received one response from a great friend that lives outside of the United States. I get to see him in the summer, and occasionally, if he is up for it, over the New year.

He says:
____________________________________________________________________________________
Ok, so I just read your last blog. I’m sure you remember this Claire, but one of the best things that anyone has ever said to me is something that you said once. You told me, whilst stood at the airport on that cold January morning, waiting for my flight home after spending the best new year ever with you, you said “I’m not going to say good bye, but instead See you in five days” after questioning this you explained that when good friends leave each other, and are reunited it only feels like they have been apart for five days, no matter how long it has been.



That comment has become the bench mark for my friendships now. I now know instantly what sort of a relationship I have with someone if there is that uncomfortable “so… what have you been doing” conversation when you meet again. I have never really had that with you, and several other people, and this summer passed summer showed that.



I’m not saying that those awkward conversations don’t arise with good friends, but they are less common. I like to use my fart rule. If you can fart in someone’s company and know they will either tell you that you are a dirty mo-fo, or they will burst out laughing, then you have a good friendship. Its when they try and ignore it, or look at you as if you are scum that you realise the friendship is not really that strong. That is why I am so happy that I can squat down, and fart in your face, and the most I will get is a slap, a punch, a kick, mild to moderate verbal abuse, maybe you will try and run me over in the gator, or you will pull your car over to the side of the road and tell me to walk the rest of the way… even if we are just at the end of the drive, or maybe you will tell me that you hate me and you want to kill me… it’s all the same… It all tells me that you love me really!
____________________________________________________________________________________

Thanks friend.
Also, I saw one of my greatest friend pairs last Wednesday, Tony and Cy, and Cy said to me: "we live in the same city and I am embarrassed that we don't see each other more often... when people ask how you are, I can't even answer- I see people from Iowa City more than I see you... its ridiculous" Its true, unfortunately, that tony and Cy and i only see each other when one party has a big event.. when the truth is, we could easily spend nearly every weekend together and be completely content.
_________________________________________________________________________________ _


This all came about as i began wondering at what point in my life did I become the one being left nd not the one leaving. Believe me- it is SO much easier to be the one leaving. I used to live with the intention of leaving and it kept me at a comfortable surface... now I will have to say that i am in deep, invested in friendships and relationships with co-workers, family and a variety of acquaintances. It is the first time in my life that i have lived somewhere for more than two years... (in the same residence) and it is a calm, at times suffocating, reality. I enjoy being here when people come back around but there are times when I sit back from it all, at the end of the summer, when the pallete is clear and say, "fuck- it used to be me leaving..." It's not regret, but a definite longing for a change of life, a chance to be the one that returns for only a few days, who survives in the surface of friendship... where there is no disappointment, there is no heartbreak, no longing for anything more, no regret. But there is also an empty deep hole where trust, confidence, security rests, often the last to be noticed, and that is what keeps me standing next to me peeps here in the metro.

Always torn... writing about the greener grass that I am standing on.



What I am listening to here and now:

Change: Bling Melon
great song, shannon hoon was before his time and there was SO much more to him than the fat bee girl

Watching the Wheels: John Lennon
I have had this song in my head for a good three weeks, timeless.

Jesus, Etc.: Wilco
My friend Jim introduced this to me over a year ago. It has a great vibe and even better strings.

By my Side: Ben Harper
Fantastic chill great song that slowly steals a smile.

Black Sheep Boy: Okkervil River
This one is for mattheew, my brother, who played this song for me five months ago... and now I appreciate it- silly me for waiting to long.


take care
c

The Last Supper.

What's that? The date is set. December 6th, 2006 I will have gastric bypass in Grinnell. I know I said the date was set before, but then there was a few other unexpected things I had to do. And now they are done, and i have learned a new form of patience... and in less than two weeks a new part of my life will start and for that, I am truly excited.

What excited me more than that are the tremendous friends that I have. you are truly the best people in the world.



Turkey Day will be considered THE LAST SUPPER. the feast of feasts with a little silver lining I like to call: family dysfunction. It is the highlight of the Holidays, I don't know what I would do without it.


I am thankful for:

my terrific friends.
my supportive family.
my roomates who both fit into both above listed categories.
my terrifid friends' supportive families.
my health and the health of my friends and family.
my dog steve (who fits into both friends and family, and roomate)
my home and the nice things in it.
my job security.
great f**king music that lets my soul fly away.


Have a wonderful Holiday weekend and be safe. for those of you who are outside of the US... happy Thursday!

Ooh- I saw 'Walk the Line' last night. I loved it. absolutely loved it. I have a new appreciation for inspiration and creativity that stems from the reality of life and addiction and heartbreak and pain and hope and life... all of those things that keep you up at night and then one day, after you have slept, make you into a better person.

much.
c

Bastard Blog

After writing what ma have been my next best entry ever, I lost my blog. I will try to capture my thoughts another day- it reflected the pros and cons of local and distant friendship... if you would like to send m your thoughts, I will include them.

I had been writing for well over an hour when I tried to bold a line and the whole thing erased. Bastard.

Write with your opinions. Which suits you better:

A long distance friendship where you once lived in the same area, you remain great friends but live way too far apart.. you see each other every six months to a year. when you reunite, it seems like no time has passed.

OR

You live in the same town, see each other weekly, talk all the time on the phone, email, etc. When you don't see each other for a week it seems like a month has passed.

email me at cblecroy@hotmail.com and give your input, share stories, send pictures.

Have a great evening!
C

You in the game called life, how you livin'?

So, for those of you that have been waiting for a good story, I will not let you down. It has been both spoken and written, many times, that "ladies" do not vomit. I know this may come as a shock to ALL of you, but my status of a lady has been tarnished. It all started at what seemed to be a casual work gathering at a local bar. It was Casino Night, an attempt at boosting company moral through drinking and prizes... it is a fool proof plan that yeilds wonderous rewards. Last year, a co-worker, Troy, got so drunk that he berated his supervisor, before winning all the prizes containing alcohol and standing on the table screaming, "Am I the only sane person here? Cyndi Lauper is SO much better than Madonna!" It was a trainwreck that was SO great to watch, partly because it wasn't me and partly because it wasn't anyone in my department. So I went into the night with few expectations, hoping that at leaast one person would fly off the handle and do something completely embarrassing. It didn't work in my favor. I did manage to have a few beers and walk away with a prize (a bottle of bacardi and two glasses.. yeah!) I took a friend with me and neither of us had had dinner. (foreshadowing) WE finished out the night and headed to the West side where we were meeting up with friends. By this time I knew that I was in it for the night and that there was no graceful way to bow out. My friend had just returned from a year away and I wanted to celebrate his return. Apparently, we were late for the party. the guys we met up with were so drunk that standing was an option. They had been at a hockey game and been drinking for a good six hours. They're comments were very flattering, but after I had to peel the fourth guy off of me after a "Remember that time we.." story, I was ready to start on my wrists with a spork. I stood in the crowded bar talking to Korey's girlfriend (who is wonderful)and we talked about what girls talk about when they are clearly outnumbered. I was up for going downtown, where at least there is a better demographic of people to talk with. Nothing against the West side bars, but it seems like a better match for the 20-22 crowd and although a lady never tells her age, I am no longer in my binge drinking prime. So the guys who are unable to stand decide that they want to go to a bar called to DRINK which is a bar that I do not prefer. (think freshman year spring break in cancun) I am not snubbing, but I guess I am a bit certain about where I like to spend my time. I started to feel a little "not well" so I waited in the car. I will say at this point is has been three hours since I have had a drink- and before that, I had only had a few beers- the point is- no dinner. So I wait in the car as the friend I am with heads in to the bar where it is determined taht we will go and save the debauchery for another night when we all start on an even playing field.

I start driving and I start to sweat. I do not feel well, and know that I have to pull over. I already feel bad because my friend has just returned from being away for a year and he goes to meet up with friends and they pretty much are so wasted that they blow him off and here I am.... not feeling so sharp. I make it almost to the interstate and it comes. I say, " Look- I don't feel well, I am going to be sick, it's not going to be prettty- you are probably going to want to look the other way." At which time I pull over to a side street, open the door, and vomit all over the street. finished? no. no. no. I get out of the car and paint the street until i can see most of my pride and pretty much all of my dignity splashed accross the pavement of surburbia. If I could have, I would have melted into the puddle and waited for the attentive neighbor to wash me down the drain... but I had to drive home.. (allow me to remind you that I was sick from not eating and was not driving under the influence- I am past that tomfoolery) So back in the car, where my friend quietly rolled down the window to let some fresh air in. After a few minutes of quiet, I looked over, smiled, and said,"welcome home."

The night actually became much better after that. My friend and I were able to stay up and chat most of the evening, listen to great music, and tell stories about life, what it is, what it has been, and what we want it to be. all in all, I wouldn't ask for the night to go any other way. I did share that story because I want all of you to be rest assured that no matter what changes in my life, that at the end of the day, I am the girl that you love, that girl that will not attempt to hide the fact ath she will vomit on a street if given the opportunity.



Top five songs of the week:
High Life by Cypress Hill This song makes me want to roll with my windows down and my system up.

Brighter than Sunshine by Aqualung This is a feel good song taht makes my heart smile.

Fall to Pieces (acoustic) by Velvet revolver. Great song, even better acoustic.

Everlong by Foo Fighters Ryan has this version that is absolutely amazing- also acoustic.

Sorry by Madonna (New album)- and I like it. alot. It makes me want to push the furniture out of the room and DANCE.

As always, still in rotation for me is The Shins 'Chutes Too Narrow" album, which can turn my frown upside down.

Alright friends, I hope that you are well, I will have more to come soon- I haven't been much of a writer lately and it comes from the winter doldrums that lurk around the corner- and I apologize for not seeking entertainment to share with you. I am sure I will have tales of a dysfunctional holiday begining att the end of this week.

Take care of yourselves.
c

public apology

I have edited and erased comments regarding my roomates on a previous post. I did not mean any ill-intention with this, but what we mean, and what happens is a different story.

I forget the readership at times, and even though the initial purpose of this blog was for me, as a chronicle, I realize that is has turned ito more of a communication between myself and those wanting to know what I am up to...

My apoogies to both of my roomates, I should have left them out of it all.

fin.
c